What’s the best thing to come out of Belfast?
The road to Enniskillen, of course!
Am I right in thinking that the rural people of Fermanagh have a little natural antipathy towards those city folk, imagining they look down their noses at us. The “sammys”, as they’re disparagingly referred to, think people here all walk around in wellies, with locals looking out from over the top of half doors while chewing on a piece of straw. Meanwhile, we think of them as trouble-making bully boys with strange accents, with as much sophistication as Shrek.
I admit I’ve often motivated my football teams before matches by referring to Belfast teams as arrogant, “who do they think they are, expecting us to lie down to them.”
I once overheard a journalist referring to Fermanagh as “sleepy” and couldn’t help thinking the same boy would’ve needed to be up early to get the better of folk here.
All generalisations, of course, but the question is do we (or they) take offence. Or is this just harmless banter.
Offence is taken easily nowadays. Worse still, I’m starting to wonder if we can identify the difference between banter, sometimes harsh, and the causes of real offence.
We’re in the middle of the Rugby Six Nations at the moment, and you may have seen the furore over a trailer that BBC Wales made. It posed the question, “what’s good about England.” Cue a series of Wales fans looking at the camera, silently, struggling and failing to come up with anything. I thought it was quite funny. But the promotional advert had to be withdrawn following complaints that it was “racist” and “pathetic”.
Seriously. One wonders what the bar is nowadays for racism and pathetic, considering some of the things going on in the world.
One England supporter complained: “If England did this about another country it would be racist.”
A bit rich, you might think, given England’s track record in their dealings across the world and, indeed, some of the awful stuff done to and said about minorities in their own country. But, perhaps even my saying that would be in danger of me being accused of being anti-English.
There can be intense rivalry between England and Wales and it works both ways. Some years ago, the presenter Ann Robinson appeared on the programme Room 101, which is based on the George Orwell 1984 novel, being the room which contains everyone’s greatest fear. The TV show asks guests to place their pet dislikes in a fictional Room 101, and Ms Robinson put the Welsh people in, describing them as “irritating and annoying.”
(The irony, I know, of Ann calling someone that!)
There was more than outrage this time, with people reporting her to the police for a hate crime. Police say they used 96 hours of time investigating, and the case was taken no further when she apologised for any offence caused.
Clearly, she meant it to be a bit of humour, however misplaced. I know this can happen; a couple of years ago I wrote a little bit of banter in this column, about Spurs beating the Arsenal “scum.” 
It certainly wasn’t meant to be taken seriously, just the usual football nonsense. But some people with a sense of humour by-pass reacted as if I’d insulted their religious beliefs.
The paper even got letters of complaints; I mean, who takes the time to write over this?
What, then, constitutes teasing and what constitutes bullying or even hate crime now? Can we really not take a joke any more?
Sometimes it seems that there are people who get up in the morning, ready to be offended.
Watching Twitter and Facebook as the debate over Donald Trump rages is interesting. People like Piers Morgan goes for the jugular in attacking people for having opinions, and when they react and be offended, he describes them as “snowflakes” as if they’re being over-sensitive. He’s a horrible bully, charmless and not even funny.
I must say that as I’ve got older, my threshold for being offended has been raised.
Over the years, I was often unfairly criticised for something that was in the paper; the worst is when somebody accuses you of publishing something “without thinking about how it affects people” or “not caring” about what you print. People, without any connection to the story, would feel entitled to ring you up at home and give you a dressing down, or even call into the office and shout at you. They don’t know, and probably don’t care, that you took a very difficult decision after agonising long and hard over it. And, to be honest, they probably don’t care. In these cases, I knew the truth of it and learned to live with that fact.
I do get annoyed inside when people misrepresent what I’ve said or done, and what is it about gossip that people enjoy so much? Nobody likes to be personally abused, but hey ho. Nobody likes to be made fun of either, but if that turns you on, go on ahead.
Be careful, though, there are many people in the community who are sensitive and going through a difficult time, and your sarcasm and hurtful and cutting comments may well have a devastating effect.
As in Proverbs “There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts”. Many of our young people have mental health issues, and whether it be worrying about their looks, or being bullied online or in person, or the pressures of exams, or for some unknown reason, we need to be careful with our words.
I read this quote recently: “The sad thing is, nobody ever really knows how much anyone else is hurting.
“We could be standing next to somebody who is completely broken and we wouldn’t even know it.”
People will never really understand something until it happens to them or their loved ones.
In this part of the world, humour can be harsh, and there’s nothing wrong with that in itself; except when we use it to demean or insult those of difference. How was the debate over the Irish language helped by certain Unionists making fun of it; how do words of insult about the Orange Order feed directly into the actions of those who attack Orange halls? Stupid basic humour about the gay community, or people of a different skin colour, or nationality, leads to prejudice and worse.
I don’t see any problem in a bit of harmless generalisation about Belfast folk from us, or by them about the culchies. Or about the rivalry between England and Wales, or other derbies around the world; but we do seem to have lost the run of what is harmless, if tough, humour as opposed to comments which cause real insult, hurt and damage.