WITH his hand placed lovingly on little George’s back, this touching photograph perhaps sums up Gary Kernaghan best; a loyal, protective father who despite having cancer was a constant tower of strength to the family he loved so dearly.

His passing last week in South West Acute Hospital has devastated all those who knew the man described simply by his devastated wife Tracey as “My Gary.” Inside the family home in Ballinamallard are many photographs like this, all of which depict a very happy, contented man who loved nothing more than spending time with his wife and three children; George (eight), Nikki (12) and Alex (13).

“People tell me he was inspiring, and he was, but he also had so much strength and never gave up until the point where his body had to stop,” said Mrs. Kernaghan.

“He did not want to be defined by cancer,” she explained, adding that it had altered the landscape of family life, and her husband’s body.

“We were a family who hiked, surfed and ran and gradually over the four years all of our favourite family activities were taken from us. For us as a family living with cancer meant most importantly getting our head around these changes as they gradually and sometime suddenly happened and learning to adapt and react as positively and purposefully as we could.

“It is so important not to get angry with cancer because if you do it stops you from enjoying whatever time you have left together. When I think of Gary I am always so thankful and full of love for a man who made our family journey with cancer easier especially when he was the one living with the cruel savage illness,” she said.

The loving father and husband was also a much treasured brother to Gordon, Herbie and Debbie Carson, son to the late Herbie and Sylvia, and stepson to Billy Anderson.

Mrs. Kernaghan described her husband’s final days in hospital as “an amazing experience.” “The nurses said they had never met a more inspirational couple or family. There was laughter coming out of that room, there were tears, and that made the journey much easier. The level of care at South West Acute Hospital was phenomenal.” “I also want to thank my mum and dad (Albert and Heather Brown) for being there for us. It meant we never had to worry, Gary never had to worry, having them here throughout this,” she said.

There was a large attendance at Mr. Kernaghan’s funeral service in Magheracross Parish Church last Thursday where his family and many friends said an emotional goodbye to the much loved man.

“I found great solace in the funeral. It was a real reflection of our lives together with young and old present rather than one defined side of the community,” said Mrs. Kernaghan, a drama teacher. “I said to the girls in the car on the way to the church; ‘This is your last chance to do a show for daddy.’ Daughters Nikki and Alex both read lessons at the funeral. Alex chose to read ‘Love is patient’ and later the congregation sang ‘Bind us together’, both the reading and the hymn were taken from the couple’s wedding over 15 years ago.

Mrs. Kernaghan read a poem by WB Yeats, entitled; ‘When you are old’.

“How many loved your moments of glad grace, And loved your beauty with love false or true, But one man loved the pilgrim soul in you, And loved the sorrows of your changing face,” she told mourners.

“People always said that about us; that we were complete opposites,” said Mrs. Kernaghan. “He never tried to change me. The day we got married he handed me a book and said; ‘People give really fancy presents at weddings, but I know you love words.’ He gave me a book of love quotations.” As she tries to adapt to life without her husband, Mrs. Kernaghan says she feels his presence with her, protecting her and the family now just as he did in life.

“I was out for my run this morning, trying to get back into a routine again. I took a deep breath, and said; ‘I hope I can do this’. I thought, Gary did it. I promised him I would do it. I do feel him really close. Before when I went for my run I stopped at certain points and thought about him. Today was the first time I stopped and thought; ‘He’s not here’. I always knew there was going to come a day when I would stop at one of those points and Gary wasn’t going to be here,” she said.

It will be the many happy, laugh out loud occasions that will help the family in the days, months and years ahead, such as one particular cherished moment days before Mr. Kernaghan’s death.

“Gary was watching ‘Fast and Furious’ with the kids. He loved movies, I didn’t do movies. I was sitting in the kitchen, maybe reading. He was sitting there with the kids; eating sweets. They were laughing. The laughter was special and I remember sitting there thinking about what was happening. That is a moment that I will cherish; the kids laughing and life being so normal. In our last conversation together he said; ‘Promise me you’ll do a movie night once a month for the kids.’ Everything for Gary was about the kids, about the family,” she said.

n HELP is available if you or somebody you know has cancer, or if you have been affected by anything you have read today.

Phone Macmillan Support Line on 0808 808 00 00 (Monday to Friday 9am to 9pm) or visit www.macmillan.org.uk Phone Cancer Research UK on 0800 800 4040 (Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm) or visit www.cancerresearchuk.org Phone Friends of the Cancer Centre on 028 90 69 9393 or visit www.friendsofthecancercentre.com n A FUND-RAISING event in aid of Macmillan Cancer Support will take place today (Thursday) at Boots, Townhall Street, Enniskillen from 5pm.

One of the organisers, Andrea McClintock is hoping people come out and support the event.

“Fermanagh has lost some wonderful people through cancer in the last few weeks. It affects all ages and in Boots as we have found that through conversations with our customers in the store. We are reminded daily how much cancer affects everyone and each person or family have their own personal story to tell.

“It is our hope that our fundraiser will help provide much needed funds for such a worthy organisation and also show our appreciation for those hard working individuals who help many families through difficult and uncertain times,” she said.